Passion, take the wheel. I'll navigate.

How many times have you heard a child be asked, or asked one yourself, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” How often would you say the answer is taken seriously? Rather than being seen as a real direction for the child, more often than not, it is brushed off as simply a glimpse into the child’s interests at the time. When that question is asked of teenagers and young adults, it morphs into implied pressure (and for some, a substantial form of dread) to figure out their whole future. Then, at some point in “adulthood”, the question becomes, “What do you do?” It’s as if the path in front of you, whatever situation you’re in, has become a single lane and the time for aspirations and options for your life has disappeared–like the concept of the dream you once had as a child vanishes when you pass this indeterminable threshold and all you could have wanted, but haven’t yet achieved, is no longer possible. That doesn’t have to be the case. At any point in time, if you look hard enough, you can discover a new direction or destination.

I will say that not everyone needs or wants a destination. Having a general direction for your adventure can be enough, and there is nothing wrong with that! Unfortunately for me, somewhere on my adventure, I was hit with the feeling that I was spending 1/3 of my day, 5 or more days a week, doing things that weren't meaningful or fulfilling, so that style of adventure was not working for me. I wanted to find something that made me feel good–something that I would be happy doing for a decent portion of my life. Spoiler alert: I found the thing that removed me from that mindset and feel very fortunate that I was able to. Once I decided to open up my mind to things I enjoyed, there were endless opportunities to explore. My outlook on the future became one of aspiration and self-motivation rather than external pressure to “figure it out” and “do something practical”. It opened my eyes to worlds and experiences I probably couldn’t have imagined.

Being on the path that your passion is leading you on can really bring a lot of interesting things into your life and allow you to find value in the seemingly mundane. Granted, it can also lead to some heavy roadblocks from external forces that may feel like you have nowhere to turn, but a slight shift in perspective can reveal new opportunities. I want to show how regular ventures mixed with unintended detours can combine to give you real, valuable experience and lead you on a truly wild journey when you find your passion and let it drive you.

Finding my Destination

Growing up, I practically collected interests and hobbies. I loved to explore and find new things to try, but there were repeated themes: trading cards, miniatures, building things of all sorts, and playing games. I also enjoyed art and technology, and throughout school I excelled in math and reading/writing. I never ran out of options for something to do, but that somewhat kept me from really finding a direction. I’m pretty sure any time I was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, the answer was different. Nothing felt completely like the right fit.

As I aged, my passion for games continued to grow, having weekly family game nights, playing with friends after school, and even making games for school projects, but having a job in it seemed absurd at the time. I tried to apply myself more practically, capitalizing on my interests and skills by exploring computer science, creative writing, and generally wanting to know how things worked with different types of engineering. Even these were just ideas to go to school for. I couldn’t picture what any of it would yield after college. Living in Minnesota (the suburbs especially), the opportunities weren’t exactly bountiful when it came to exploring careers. There are a lot of corporate headquarters and medical companies, but not many were related to entertainment or creativity.

After giving University “the old college try”, I came to the conclusion that I needed to take some time and find my own motivation instead of being driven by societal pressure. During this academic hiatus, I had the opportunity to spend some time in Los Angeles, which really expanded my horizons. It was here that I started looking into online schools to resume learning and finding my path. I stumbled upon Full Sail University and discovered their Game Design program. It was the first time I saw how art, writing, programming, design, and more could all fit together into a degree program and teach me how to produce something I loved. I could tap into all of my skills and interests, and as I thought about what games meant to me, it finally clicked why I felt so passionate about them. They can teach, challenge, bring people together, and just all around bring joy to people from all walks of life. I want to create that sensation for others. I want to see people having fun and know that I could make people feel that way. That was going to be my destination.

With all of these realizations coming to light, I thought about the games that impacted me most as a player and reflected on their designs. I played many games off and on over the years, but the game that continued to keep my attention, and still does to this day, was League of Legends. Being a long-time fan, I decided to apply to the Game Design Internship with Riot Games along with some of my classmates. After a few weeks, I received a rejection, but it was the most helpful advice I had ever received in finding direction.

That last sentence has stuck with me for nearly a decade. It not only made me aware that I didn’t have the experience they were looking for, but it also advised me on where to go. That was all I needed to start mapping out my career journey and let my passion take the wheel.

Charting the Course

Up until this point I had largely worked in retail, which explains the lack of experience “inside or outside the office”. Now, how do I go from retail to office experience? If I continued on my current path, gaining more managerial experience would probably be best considering management typically requires some administrative tasks and would display leadership and teamwork. Production of any kind would definitely involve those skills. Great! Easy. I was already headed in this direction.

Surely, office experience can’t be the only thing I’d need to get me into a career in games, so how would that translate to making games? I would probably have to transition to some sort of tech or creative company to be at least near design/development. I was also well aware that getting out of Minnesota would help in opening up my options, but I kept it on the back burner as I focused on what I could do with my current situation. With the course charted and knowing what I would look for moving forward, I was ready to set out.

Checkpoint 1: Retail Management

As I set out on my journey, I already had some familiarity with retail management, so I continued collecting experience in additional fields and tried to grow in my roles each time: Teller to Lead Teller, Sales Associate to Stock Lead, then Assistant Store Manager. They not only gave me different forms of team management and leadership skills but also demonstrated growth. Each allowed me to take the knowledge I had already acquired and apply it to new roles. Finding the value in my work started to become a key part of my process. If I could find value in the work, then I could really apply myself, which in turn would only benefit me more in the end.

I was still continuing my classes for Game Design (one project would eventually become Last Jack*ss Standing). In time, I came to a point that felt as if the payoff from my retail management experience was reaching a plateau considering I knew that I would leave it someday. It was time to start searching for what else was out there, and although some of the things I was finding felt like a shot in the dark, I thought they were still worth a try to help me advance. I found myself at a juncture that, while it terrified me as a drastic change, appeared to be an ideal shortcut: a QA role, still in Minnesota, with Activision.

Shortcut! Checkpoints 2 & 3: Technical & Gaming

This was an amazing opportunity! The next two checkpoints I had planned for my journey would, in a way, happen at once. The idea of moving shifted to be a long-term goal as I focused on the very beneficial path I found myself on. I was gaining exposure to AAA game development, having my name in the credits to prove it, and learning the process firsthand. Considering my planned route technically had its boxes checked off, I had to adjust what my next step would be. Something creative or production-related would probably be a good next step to familiarize myself with more of the design process. For most of my time at Activision, I was also still in school, but AAA game development was grueling work. I was benefiting from hands-on experience in my field of study, but balancing 12-hour workdays for unknown periods while coordinating online group projects across 4-5 time zones became overwhelming. I had to stop my classes because, unfortunately, the classes weren’t paying my bills.

My time at Activision gave me 2.5 Call of Duty titles to my name (I helped on one game for a very brief stint but my name is in the credits so I’m claiming it as a half). I tried to stay as long as possible, but I was also securing familiarity with another major component of the industry: contracts. I had no choice but to leave due to reaching the maximum contract length and hadn’t spent enough time there to transition to a full-time role. There was a cool-down period I could come back after, but starting a new job with the intention to leave after a few months, if Activision would even have me back, seemed difficult to plan around. I wanted to continue to grow and couldn’t wait around on something theoretical, so I needed to find another way to proceed. The best way I could stay on my course was to continue with QA and focus on my participation in the Product Development process.

Detour: Product Development & Marketing

After a couple of months searching for QA roles, knowing my contract was ending at Activision, I landed a Product Quality Assurance position with a TV shopping company (still in Minnesota). If you are wondering what that entails, it is just as interesting as it sounds. Vendors would send us products that we would evaluate based on things like what the product was, how it was packaged, how it was going to be sold (on air or online), and what features of the product were going to be showcased for viewers. Then, we would advise the vendors on what needs to be done before we can sell, adjust the way the product would be sold, approve it, or tell them we can’t sell it in its current state. I evaluated products like watches, jewelry, health & beauty products, electronics, plants, kitchen devices, and more, each of which had its own testing requirements. The knowledge I amassed here was so expansive that I couldn’t begin to remember even half of what I evaluated. In addition to the product-specific evaluations, I was trained in verifying proper shipping of Hazardous Materials, validating statements said on-air and shown on packaging according to FTC requirements, ensuring proper safety standards are met based on local, state, and federal guidelines, identifying the optimal features to be demonstrated on-air and the best way to show them, and even helping write instructions for products still in development. It was truly a unique experience and was almost too broad because I found it very difficult to figure out where to go next. 

It started to feel like a major detour. Applying here and there, companies told me that my QA experience was too focused on physical products or functionality testing to be considered good knowledge for development. With already low quantities of local creative companies, I started thinking about a move again, but finding an entry-level position that would afford me a move and living alone in a new place was difficult. I was worried I boxed myself in too much until I realized I had accumulated intimacy with something I wasn’t really searching for, but found myself in: marketing. Looking ahead, marketing and creative have some overlap which would be beneficial. I began looking at roles in QA and marketing in addition to gaming and compiled lists for different cities ranking them on affordability and the quantity of opportunities. Eventually, with some patience, I was presented with an amazing opportunity…in Los Angeles! Unfortunately, a very unexpected roadside attraction was also about to appear, known as COVID-19.

Checkpoint 4: Creative Production

The next major leg of my journey would bring me to Los Angeles in Creative Marketing Production. My first day would be March 11, 2020, which, looking back, would come with a catch that nobody could have predicted. I received the offer weeks before and planned my cross-country road trip, arriving there on Monday, March 9, and starting in the office on Wednesday. My last day in the office would be Friday before remote work became the new normal and the entire world started to change. After that, so much happened in such a short period of time for me, but my job continued, and I was where I wanted to be, so I kept moving forward.

I started as QA / Associate Producer handling the production of art assets at scale and, after lots of expansion on the client side, I quickly took on further responsibilities to help start a new team as a Producer that handled publishing and QA. I would be the lead of a global team being spun up with members in Singapore and Amsterdam so that we could have 24-hour support on the efforts. Besides facilitating communication across teams, I wrote documentation, handled reporting, and helped the client set up new processes and standards for continued growth for what would become a new department entirely.

As this transitional project wrapped, the timing could not have been better, as my next big opportunity arose with Riot Games on the Marketing team as a Content Producer. This was it! Another culmination of my background and at the company I dreamed of joining. I would be a part of creating that magic I experienced as a player.

I would support their mobile game Wild Rift’s marketing campaigns and my first would be the cross-product Arcane launch event. It was MASSIVE and really felt like a trial by fire, but it was so worth it. I was working on the IP I had been so passionate about and knew I would put my whole heart into everything I produced. I was later asked to support a big campaign for VALORANT alongside my Wild Rift duties, giving me some multi-product exposure and providing me with the opportunity to collaborate with the Operations teams to help standardize and optimize processes and systems. Unfortunately, the ugly mug of contracts was about to show its face again and I wasn’t sure where I could go. I was so close to games, but I didn’t have enough development experience to be a Game Producer, and not enough creative/design experience under my belt to be a Designer. I needed to take a beat and reorient myself. After speaking to some people at Riot for advice on what would benefit my resume, I decided to pick up a volunteer Game Producer job with an indie company and focus on getting my game design portfolio together. These would give me Production practice and highlight my design capabilities while still having an income-earning job.

Side Quest: Production Systems Design

Career-wise I had really gained a lot of familiarity with production processes and systems collaborating with multiple teams. So far on the production leg of my journey, I have been both at a creative agency and client-side with Marketing which gave me experience working with teams across many different types of production: Graphic Design, Illustration, Photo Editing/Retouching, Video, Animation, Copywriting, Game Development, Game Analytics, Gameplay Capture, Creative Direction, Brand Management, Social Media Management, Influencer Management, Experiential, and that’s probably not even all of it. Alongside production duties, I supported production where I would evaluate and optimize existing processes, create new systems to operate out of, and find ways to gather and report data on production efforts for leadership. This led me to an opportunity with Apple in production to create materials such as specs docs, workflow documentation, resource hubs, and tracking documents/systems while evaluating and optimizing those processes across workstreams and products. 

Thanks to years of practice finding the fun in my work, I actually managed to discover a practical application of my skills and what I enjoy doing that could never have been explained to me as an option in school. This practice also allowed me to find a new perspective by looking at designing these production systems as making a game in a way. They are essentially an arbitrary system designed for people to interact with and get something out of. There are variables, functions, elements of UI, and UX processes; it has similar components to designing a game, and I put the same level of effort and attention into it as I would on a game. I enjoy taking the time to break down, analyze, and design these systems to help people and make their daily lives easier. Who doesn’t want to put in the least amount of effort to still get the job done thoroughly? I break it all down into its components and make sure every piece has a purpose and operates as efficiently as possible for all parties involved. Granted, unlike a game, it's not necessarily “fun” that people are getting out of it, but why can’t work be as intentional and effortless as a game? You spend 8 hours a day, 5 days a week doing it. Why not make it a little easier? Especially when someone who is passionate about it wants to help do it for you.

So, while I spend my time at work not necessarily as a Producer, Game Designer, or on a AAA game, I am definitely still collecting experience. My spare time is even filled with creating games and other interactive content. I like to challenge myself, but I am very sensible when it comes to pursuing roles I think I would be a good fit for. It can feel like a real punch in the gut at times to be told I don’t have the experience, but it has led me to another shift in mindset. The idea I once had of what reaching my destination would look like has a much broader view. Being a Game Designer is now so much more than just a job title to me.

Destination

Not everyone can fit all the experience that makes them fit for a role on a one or two-page resume, especially when they’ve spent so much time charting that course and finding the value in the journey itself. I’ve known for a while that I should have a portfolio, but it felt like such a daunting task for so long that it paralyzed me from taking action. I was spending all of my time acting on the professional advice I had received. I was told I needed to have certain titles, so I applied myself to earn them. I was told I didn’t have enough games under my belt, so I made games in my spare time. The more and more I did, the harder it became to show it all. Not to mention trying to give the ambition a break and make sure I still had fun along the way. For the past 6 months, since I hit “publish” on my portfolio, I’ve been trying to stay focused on showcasing what I’ve done so I can spend more time looking ahead. Is it a perfect portfolio? Definitely not. But I now have a place to update with new things and build upon rather than stress over not having something to prove my worth. I’ve done a lot of reflecting on my journey and I’m very proud of everything I’ve accomplished both within my career and without.

I have volunteered at and attended conferences, joined organizations, and even printed a playable prototype of my own game to demo at a convention. I have worked on many games over the years, both during school and after, as well as continuously crafting the always-expanding D&D world I have created. I volunteered for a game company while I had another job just to get more experience in development. I now, finally, have my portfolio ready to share so that as I complete new projects, it can only grow. I even have a place to write when I want to highlight processes without taking away from a “product” page. I am doing everything in my power to gain experience and make sure I enjoy myself along the way. While my job title may not be Game Designer, I certainly am one, and I will continue to grow from any and all experience I collect. I have reached my destination, but the journey will not stop here.